I mean, I don't know you, and you don't know me, so I guess outside is best, you know. This is gonna be fun! We can stay up late, swappin' manly stories, and in the mornin'. Please! I don't wanna go back there! You don't know what it's like to be considered a freak. And there's that big awkward silence you know? You'retrying to give them a hint, and they won't leave. Like I hate it when you got somebody in your face. I guess you don't entertain much, do you? Just who are you trying to keep away? Just tell me that, Shrek? No, it's one of those drop-it-and-leave-it-alone things. Oh, this is one of those onion things, isn't it? You know what, Shrek? I think this whole wall thing is to keep somebody out! There's just ME and MY swamp! And the first thing I'm gonna do is build a ten-foot wall around my land. You know, when we're though rescuing the princess and all that.ĭonkey, there's no "we", no "our". Say, Shrek, what're we gonna do with our swamp? And you and Shrek, well, you got a lot in common. 'Wow,' he says, 'that's amazing' Just then a nurse comes to tell the man he has a phone call. Finally, she says, 'You're ninety-three' The old man is astonished.
He stands there for a good minute with this old woman's hands gently cupping his balls. Only the true love's kiss can break the spell. The old man is puzzled, but he does what she says. But you only look like this at night, Shrek's ugly 24/7!īut Donkey, I'm a princess! And this is not how a princess is supposed to look! like this.Īll right, all right, calm down. That's why I have to marry Lord Farquaad before the sun sets, and he sees me. Every night I become this, this horrible ugly beast! I was placed in the tower to await the day when my true love would rescue me. It's a spell! When I was a little girl, a witch cast a spell on me. "By night one way, by day another / Thus shall be the norm / Till you receive true love's kiss / then, take love's true form." What d'you mean? Look, I ain't never seen you like this before! it's been this way as long as I can remember. Yeah! What was it, something you ate? I told Shrek those weedrats were a bad idea! Parfait's may be the most delicious thing on the whole damn planet! NO! You dense, irritating, miniature beast of burden! Ogres are like onions! End of story! Bye-bye! See ya later. You know what ELSE everybody likes? Parfaits! Have you ever met a person, you say, "Let's get some parfait," they say, "Hell no, I don't like no parfait."? Parfaits are delicious! I don't care what everyone likes! Ogres are not like cakes. CAKE! Everybody loves cake! Cakes have layers! Oh, you leave 'em out in the sun, they get all brown, start sproutin' little white hairs. For your information, there's a lot more to ogres than people think.
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